We’ve all read or watched the outrageous claims made by republicans that Barack Obama is a terrorist or has terrorist ties (either to the Weathermen or his supposed Islamic past). In the American eye a terrorist is someone of Islamic faith who has become so brainwashed and racist that they must exact revenge on America. Terrorists spread fear throughout the heart of America. You’ll be lucky if you ever see words like: An individual that believes radical solutions are the only way to solve egregious social problems.

The irony is that at recent speeches by both McCain and Palin supporters have shouted the word “terrorist” in response to questions like “Who is the real Barack Obama” . One supporter even went as far as to shout “Kill him“. They believe that fear-mongering is the only way to stop Obama ascending to the Presidency so they’ll say anything and everything in the hope of stopping him.

It begs the question: Who are the racist, brainwashed, fear-mongering extremists now?

Why on earth would you do that there!? Some people like a bit of danger but going at it on a railway track is akin to bobbing for apples in shark infested waters with a bloody nose.

Now, it is undoubtedly a shame but you can’t help but snigger a bit when the official spokesman comes out with a line like: “They continued with their business”. Surely the sound of several tonnes of steel hurtling towards you, moving the very ground you stand lie on would raise an eyebrow or two…or four.

In the end though you have to wonder: Arriving behind schedule, shocked and shaken staff and customers and the death of 2 people - It’s just like Scottish rail travel.

1. Writing “Text back” or “TB” or whatever the kids are saying these days in texts. Sorry, but I’ll text back if I bloody well want to.

2. People that smell. This may be a bit of a vague generalisation but there is nothing worse than people that seemingly haven’t discovered showers, deodorent or aftershave/perfume.

3. Guys that go to the barbers with a nearly bald head. Middle aged men and old men are notorious for this. I had more hair on my chest at the age of 14 than they have on their head currently. Of course it takes a good 10 minutes for the 23 hairs to be styled appropriately, usually a combover number.

4. Dicks that go to clubs to pick a fight in the middle of a dancefloor.

5. People that spread aids. Seriously, that’s not cool.

So this was a small instalment, but in the coming weeks expect a major push in US Election blogging. I’m sure you eagerly anticipate my severely liberal views to be trouncing conservative ideals.

England should be copying teams that are playing - These teams managed to qualify whereas England did not! This is why I have decided to give everyone a tip for the tournament - Click the Red Button and choose Five Live Commentary to avoid the constant ramblings of Motson and Lawrenson on how this tournament begs for a Gerrard, a Rooney or a Terry! It bloody well does not beg for any of those classless unprofessionals.

Also, the constant need to associate foreign players to an England International player’s position is utterly pointless! “Playing in that Ashley Cole style” - Really? Is he? I thought that was called left back myself. As far as I know that term has been used since before moneybags was born!? Clearly not in Motson’s head. Why not the “Patrice Evra sort style”? Why not the “Garry Hay style”!?

The sooner England are knocked out the bett… oh wait!

OH SNAP!

People who nickname themselves Kaka during kickabouts - You’re not Kaka mate, you are totally crap though. The best way to deal with such bell-ends during random games is to stand them up by 2 yards and wait for the opportune moment to nip the ball away. Honestly, it just pisses them off. The real Kaka though is just short of god-like status.

Traffic Lights - Are they not just the bane of your existence? Apparently there are 38 sets in the 8 miles between my house and university. Is there a f**king need for half of them? NO. There are now 4 sets down the A68 in Dalkeith each about 150 yards from each other serving no other purpose than to let people cross - GET RID OF THEM. Make the distance between them larger - It’ll help reduce the obesity issues people in this country have if they have to walk further or faster to cross the road. Or bring back more zebra crossings.

The price of sweets - Do you remember the days of paying about 30p for a bar of Dairy Milk? Nowadays you’d be lucky if you’re paying under 55p for one. It is extortion, plain and simple. What about places like WH Smith and Woolworths that thrived on the offers like 5 for £1. You’d be lucky to get 2 for £1 these days!

Buckfast and other Neddy drinks are partly responsible for the downfall of society - I have a solution. You see, Neds are allergic to any sort of culture - It’s their kryptonite in a way. Hence why the government should force Buckfast to change it’s name to Le vin de moines. Could you imagine young Chantelle and Chelsea-Jade asking for Le vin de moines at their local off-license!? How about we change Lambrini to Le Vin de Raisin Doux Italien while we’re at it?

Old people that have the sole purpose of stopping in the middle of a busy street. Do you not realise you’re in everybody’s way? Do you not know there are 20 difference coffee shops in 100 yard radius of where you’re currently talking to Margaret? You had all week to go shopping with her, why not Monday at 10am? No, you have to go Saturday at 1pm, don’t you? Just to cause everyone else pain!

I hope you enjoyed this first installment - There are plenty more to come!

Believe me, there s a point to this blog and it’s coming up in the next paragraph…

She’s actually trapped in the bathroom!

Am I the only one disgusted at the thought of her growing skin OVER THE TOILET SEAT!? Only in America, and more specifically the South, could you find someone so mentally unstable that they spend 2 years of their life on the toilet. Still, the best bit about this story is the section at the bottom - Apparently the accused had tried to coax her out of the bathroom everyday! I’d like to know what sort of coaxing this involved!

• Come out of the bathroom dear, or you’ll get the stale smell of shite on your chips!
• I’m sick of running round to the neighbours house when I’ve had a night out with the lads and the 8 Corona’s have finally caught up with me!

He claims that time flew, but surely after a day on the toilet or two (Before the real psychological and dermatological damage was done!) he’d have tried to get her out of there?

Anyway, sticking on news from the Scotsman how about this for a Dalkeith Tale (I’m considering opening a new blog part called Dalkeith Tales just to chronicle the delights of Dalkeith and its denizens!) A mini-bike!? Your child’s mini-bike!? This sort of story just sums up this enchanting little town perfectly!

Robed Obama Picture Ignites Row - Okay, the mudslinging has really begun. How low will Hilldog go next? There’s no shame in Obama wearing this, in fact it only highlights the presidential aspect of his character - Willing to wear the traditional clothing of a nation out of respect to it’s cultures. We could go as far as showing a picture of Hilldog’s gigantic ass and asking whether that thing is registered to vote!? I’m not going to however, though the mere insinuation is enough to peak your interest I’m sure. Rumour has it Sir Mix-A-Lot is considering a Hilldog Remix!

Not only is this latest Clinton Campaign attack weak, but it makes me wonder what they will have to do to get some real dirt on Obama? That is of course, if there is any at all. Will the General be this bad? McCain will probably not pull any punches, so a united Democratic Front needs to be forged. Obama is now the front runner by between 1 and 8 points (Depending on who you read/believe) and Hilldog may have to start backtracking some of her comments if she wants to be considered again for the Democratic Nomination if they were to lose this time around.

Afterall: Nobody votes for the sore loser, let alone the even bigger loser that lost her campaign’s nomination previously!

So this got me thinking. Spammers and other people make tens of millions each year through scams. What sort of moron lets these people steal from them!? The amount of emails I get saying  “Get Vi@gra at ch3ap pr!ces” are annoying enough but how stupid do you need to be to actually access the site! The vast majority of Net users are aged between 18 and 45 so it’s hardly an ideal age range for potential Viagra users to begin with. Then you move onto the fact that those at the age range that is targeted are more concerned with whether or not they can remember if they’ve fed that cat today let alone know how to purchase anything on the net.

Spam ranting aside I’ve been very busy these past few weeks. University has begun to take it’s toll this term and I’m spending a ridiculous amount of time working on stuff that doesn’t even interest me anymore. Still, I’ll stick at it!

On the other hand it’s good to have a bit of confidence and optimism back. I think I’ll start scheduling runs for about 5pm, head out to towards the countryside for a few miles and head back so I still avoid having to stop for cars due to rush hour.

Also, I’m 4 miles ahead of my early goal of 5 miles a week! That’s discounting the few miles I’ll have ran on Sunday playing football. I could put it in my boot but asking a substitute to try and remain within 60ft of me at all times is asking a bit much!

So you might find yourself asking why did I buy this and why is it going to better? I decided to buy it as I think it’s going to be the best way for me to properly get fit other than running down a wing for 90 minutes every other Sunday. It’ll be nice to actually have my speed and distance counted and it’s going to drive me to reach new goals. I honestly can’t wait to get started tomorrow.

I’m trying to think of goals to set myself - maybe 5 miles per week for the first 2 weeks, then 10 and increase up to about 20 miles after a few months.

This does in fact mean I own a iPod Classic and an iPod Nano, but I’m getting a free iPod Nano when I renew my phone contract, so I can sell it and recover most of the money spent.

Expect a different me!

Maybe less random philosophical and psychological blog posts, more funny random crap!? I think my brain has just been a bit frazzled by the last week or so and I’m in a ranting mood!

How scary!?

Anyway, my worries for Killie are mounting. We just lost our top goalscorer AGAIN to another SPL team. In typical Killie fashion we haven’t had a chance to sign anybody to replace him. It’s ridiculously frustrating knowing that the club are just weakening and weakening every few months.

In other news: I was reading the BBC Site with the US Election Update and was surprised to see that out of the $107m spent on TV ads amongst the Presidential Candidates only Barack Obama has not went negative yet. I can only hope it stays this way. With Edwards now out of the race I hope he endorses Obama to give him a better chance against Clinton before Super Tuesday.

Anyway, I’ve managed to get 2500 word written on Groupwork and I can only hope I never achieve such boredom again! Mind you, in my line of study I will probably be just as bored about 20 times in the next 3 days

Anyway, since I started this blog already some things have changed - Killie didn’t get gubbed by Airdrie for one thing! Maybe there is some passion and ability in some players after all? Now that I’ve got this essay out the way I’ve got a bit of motivation going again for coursework which is a major boost too.

Also, to add to the excitement of the end of week celebrations I’m also going to see Marlow at Cabaret Voltaire on Thursday night - Should be pretty damn good! If you’re into something similar to U2 then maybe you should head along too.

I’m trying to decide if I want to get back into running. One of the forums I visit has inspired me of talk about the Nike+ iPod Nano kit. Of course, me being me I don’t own an iPod Nano (I have a classic of course!) or a decent pair of running shoes. The 2 hours of running I do at football each week isn’t enough and I’d really like to keep track of fitness and heart rate so I’ll think it over.